Last night, Pastor John spoke, once again, of being desperate. I sat there I looked down at my black rubber bracelet from two years ago - it reads "desperate" and I thought, "Am I still desperate?"
What are my most desperate prayers? Some of them have been just for me. But for most of these last two years they've been for those who don't have a clue how much Jesus loves them. Yesterday our Portland leaders team had breakfast together. As we were going over the bucket prayers that were nameless on paper, but so well known by God, I started to cry. My heart went out to all those desperate prayers: prayers for serious health issues, financial crisis, and then the prayer, "To believe in you God." Reading the prayers of guilt, some of hope for friends and family far from God, my heart felt a desperation to live this one and only life to be a friend who will do anything to share the hope of Jesus and his love. I am still desperate!
Jesus prayed desperate prayers; in the garden before he was arrested, and on the cross as he was dying. Jesus also prayed prayers that went unanswered. One of Jesus' most powerful prayers is in John 17:21. He asked God to bring a "oneness" into the hearts of believers that was just like the connection He had with His Father. For nearly 2,000 years this prayer has gone unanswered. That's a long time to wait for a prayer to be answered. Today, more than 35,000 denominations and sects exist, all claiming God of the Bible as the ONE. Jesus' prayer will be answered. He's planting a desperation in our lives - a singular focus, a dream of passion to see people so filled with His love that they really do love each other and work together as Jesus and His Father did.
I want to keep praying prayers of desperation - a feeling that to do less is not even a option.
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